Do you know that scene in Garden State where Natalie Portman tells Zach Braff that if he stands in one spot and makes weird noises while moving around he’ll be doing something completely original? (If you don’t, go rent the movie—or watch it again—because it’s absolutely hilarious.)

The point is that there’s actually a whole philosophical debate about whether or not there are any truly original thoughts left. I’ll leave the philosophizing to philosophers, but I think that when it comes to weddings it’s pretty safe to say that if you can imagine it, someone else can, too—and already has.

When my fiancée and I started talking about what we wanted from our event, we both used words like “unique” and phrases like “one of a kind.” After a few months of planning, being forced to watch way too many wedding shows, and being shown way too many wedding magazines, I’ve concluded that every idea is a variation on one that’s been done before. Do you want to arrive or leave your wedding in a plane/helicopter/hot-air balloon/motorcycle? Done! Think that live animals will set your event apart? That was so two years ago! Getting Tasered at your own reception? Done! (Okay, that wasn’t on purpose, but it was on the news a few weeks ago.)

At this point, my goal is to throw a really awesome party for the people who are really near and dear to us. I’m not interested in making this a “once in a lifetime” event. I’m not interested in making a statement about what “good taste” we have or trying to impress our guests. I’m certainly not trying to make everyone who is involved “happy.” I love having people over for dinner and cooking because I love knowing that something I did made people feel good. I’m certainly not cooking for our 200 wedding guests, but if they can walk away saying they felt good after the wedding—whether it was because of the food, the dancing, or the flowers—then it will be worth it for me. And if a few of them feel good just by celebrating the fact that two people love each other and are committing themselves to that notion . . . well, all the better.

Josh, Bridal Party’s guest-blogging groomzilla, writes every Wednesday about the groom’s perspective on wedding planning and everything that comes with it. To follow his story from the beginning, click here.