Daily dispatches on the Washington, DC area's food, restaurant and dining scene.

Chew on This: What Are the 100 Things Restaurant Staffers Should Never Do?

By Kate Nerenberg

On the New York Times' You're the Boss blog, first-time restaurateur Bruce Buschel is writing "The Start-Up Chronicle," which documents the making of his Southampton, New York restaurant. Last month, he posted a two-part list of 100 do's and don'ts for his servers, and restaurant-industry controversy ensued.

The list runs the gamut from hygiene (number 12: Do not touch the rim of a water glass. Or any other glass.) to attitude (number 58: Do not bring judgment with the ketchup. Or mustard. Or hot sauce. Or whatever condiment is requested.).

We know everyone has pet peeves when they eat out. So, we want to know your thoughts on the list: Would you add any rules or take anything off?  Servers, please chime in, too. Are Buschel's rules realistic or idealistic? Let us know your thoughts in the comments! 

Comments

Though I agree with almost all of these rules, and the posted comments above... my question as a server for countless years is this- When I know I do/don’t do the rules listed, why do most guests never take notice of the ACTUAL great service they are getting. I think that this list needs to work BOTH ways - yes there are many, many not great servers out there, but when you DO have one, I think that guests need to go the extra mile and if they have the funds leave a few extra dollars over sufficient, tell the manager about the great service, or email the company directly. Many times guests are so quick to complain about this or that little thing that happened that was beyond the servers control, but makes it out to be their fault not realizing the server did everything they were capable to doing to rectify the wrong doing. All I’m saying is that especially in this economy, us servers feel it as well; it would be nice to get some positive feedback rather than the negative and the lists stating everything that we might do wrong!!! Furthermore, the comment posted by Maggie M. regarding receiving change back - if you are a guest and you are paying with two twenties, but need the change to leave a tip than YOU should be the one to tell the server that you would like change in that form. Many people don’t like to carry around a bunch of small bills, and that may be why the server will give a ten rather than fives. It is the guests responsibility to keep the server aware of what they need. It may be our job to serve you but we have no crystal ball and ARE NOT MIND READERS!!!! You can only expect the guest to bring you what you ask for beyond the normal ketchup with fries and a spoon for soup - they rest is up to the guest knowing how to COMMUNICATE!!! Take the initiative to let us know how to please you. Please.

Posted by: Lauren, Nov 11, 2009 10:42:53 AM

This is a hint to servers from a frequent diner...
When a customer pays in cash and needs change, give the customer change that can be used for a tip. Don’t think that you can get more out of a customer by just giving back fives and tens. In the economy we have now, a lot of customers will leave NO tip, rather than leave an extra generous tip. If the bill is for $28.00 and the customer pays with two $20’s, give back 2 ones and two fives. You are more likely to get a reasonable tip. But, if you give back 2 ones and a 10... you might end up with only a $2.00 tip because it is doubtful you will get a 10 spot.

Posted by: Maggie M., Nov 10, 2009 01:26:20 PM

I posted my comments on the NYT website and will repeat them here.

As a former server for five years in NY and DC, I agree with the vast majority of this list - however, I find the tone of the NYT article offensive. The writer seems to have disdain for servers and confuses impersonal with good service. Waiting tables is less like Hamlet and more like improv - with audience participation. One never knows how the situation will evolve; each individual and each table is different. Applying a rigid set of rules for interacting with guests assumes whatever servers you are hiring are not bright enough to read the situation and act appropriately.
Limiting a server to a script assumes every guest wants to be treated the same way; whereas the reality is a server could wait on a bachelorette party, a group of business men, a couple on a first date and a retirement party in the same night. Some want a festive server to entertain them and some want hands off service.
I waited tables at a number of establishments over the five years I was in the industry and was consistently the most requested server because I developed a rapport with my guests. I think many of these points are valid and blatant up selling is obnoxious but often, guests ask your opinion (which as a vegetarian at a steakhouse I skated as
much as possible - but when pressed on the “what is your favorite question” - I would disclose the vegetarian thing.) I am not suggesting you become best friends with your table, but I think that
personable service is as much a reason that guests return to an establishment as is the quality of the food - servers are not robots.
As such, I respectfully disagree with 7, 32, 39, (I often refer to a woman as a lady but would not address her as such), 42, 43, and 44. That said, I think some rules are no brainers and should be
universally applied - for example 4, 5, 6, 12, 13, 14, 15, 17. Also, I agree with number 30, maybe you should add wipe the dust off a bottle
of wine before serving it? 23 - is a great addition to service; I had not thought of it - however it is time consuming and would be difficult to do on an busy night.

Posted by: Brianne , Nov 10, 2009 11:36:29 AM

Servers, hosts and bussers should never accept less than minimum wage for doing their job. They should not accept toxic work schedules and seating charts that award prime tables to certain servers over others. They should never, ever silently accept a customer or manager groping or sexually harassing them. They should not accept unfair tip-out policies that favor one group over another. They should not have to work in unsafe conditions. All of these happened to me as a server. Hey, maybe we need a Servers’ Bill of Rights!

Posted by: Mariya, Nov 10, 2009 10:59:36 AM