Thursday, June 26: Oddball bar Palace of Wonders on H Street, Northeast, is celebrating its second birthday, and you’re invited to a special party before the official festivities Friday and Saturday. Enjoy drink specials and a general carnivallike atmosphere. If you have fun, head back on Friday and Saturday for the official parties.

If you like your theater in easy-to-digest formats, than the Source Festival is the place for you this weekend. The festival, held at the newly renovated space at 14th and T streets, NW, is presenting a slew of ten-minute plays. You heard that right—no play lasts longer than it’d take you to make a Starbucks run. Take your pick—the full schedule is here.

OMG, your Fourth of July beach weekend fell through?! Worry not, city-bound friend—we’ve got a roundup of events to make the most of the holiday. Check out our guide to the Fourth, and start planning a day of America-rific fun!

Related: Ooh! Aah! Where to Watch the Fireworks in Washington—From Traditional Spots to the Unexpected

It’s been 232 years since the Declaration of Independence was adopted. Celebrate with a visit to the National Archives, where a dramatic reading of the document by Thomas Jefferson, John Adams, and Ben Franklin will start at 10 AM on the Constitution Avenue steps. Afterward, until 2 PM, patriotic music and family fun—with temporary tattoos!—will abound.

The Smithsonian Folklife Festival runs June 25 through 29 and July 2 through 6, so you can brave the crowds and check out this year’s cultural offerings on the National Mall between Seventh and 14th streets. If you’ve never been, the Smithsonian packs the two-week event with music, food, dancing, crafts, cooking demonstrations, and outdoor exhibits from a diverse sampling of world cultures: this year, Bhutan, Texas, and. . . NASA. (Hey, we said it was diverse!) Open 11 to 5:30.

On Wednesday nights from late April through mid-September, the Annapolis Yacht Club hosts Wednesday Night Races. Even if you don’t know a mainsail from a jib, there are opportunities to join the crew of a competing boat.

The races are mostly a social affair, and many boats need a spare hand. Veteran crew members will show you the ropes and give you a few pointers about how to move about the boat, where to be, and (most important) where not to be. Soon you’ll find yourself in the thick of a race, leaning over the boat’s high side (a move called hiking) and feeling the wind and cooling mist rising off the bay. Rush hour will seem a million miles away.

Seriously, don’t forget about the Smithsonian’s Folklife Festival starting this Wednesday. If you haven’t passed through this lovely amalgamation of all things folk art, music, culture, and food, now’s the time to make good. Featured this year are the nation of Bhutan, NASA, and Texas. Daytime events run from 11 to 5:30, with evening activities (a lot of Texas/country-style dancing) starting at 6.

The Library of Congress’s Mary Pickford Theater is an unheralded gem for random movie screenings. This week has the five-time Oscar nominee Mary, Queen of Scots on Tuesday at 7 and the Japanese film The Eternal Monument (“the story of a group of female high school students assigned to the [Okinawa] army field hospitals”) on Thursday at 7.

Insufferable? Try adorable.

Robin Givhan’s tribute to special-effects guru Stan Winston had us misty-eyed . . . and then pissed. Discussing Winston’s work, Givhan writes in the Washington Post: “ ‘Terminator 3: Rise of the Machines’ will not be discussed here even though Winston worked on it. The film pales in comparison to its predecessors and it co-stars the insufferable Claire Danes, whose resting facial expression can best be described as condescension.” Yeah, Terminator 3 sucked, but excuse us, Robin—did you really just call Angela Chase, a.k.a the heroine of our teenage years, insufferable? Because if you did, we might have to go all Rayanne on you.

Guess his karma is not huge after all: Mike Myers’s The Love Guru tanked at the box office with a whimpering $14 million.

RIP, George Carlin. 

Monday, June 23: First Night of Fort Reno
There’s no better way to kick off the first official week of summer than by heading to the kickoff of Fort Reno, the free outdoor indie-rock concert series (directions here). Tonight’s show will be headlined by Olivia Mancini & the Housemates, who play upbeat pop tunes filled with trumpets, hand claps, and harmonies. Shows start around 7:15. If you want more free summer music, check out our guide to free concerts around town, and the full schedule of Fort Reno.

Tuesday, June 24: Half-Price Belgian Beer
This warm weather got you itching for an outdoor happy hour? Let me recommend an oldie-but-goodie happy hour that’s a favorite for my friends and me: half-price Belgian beers at Bohemian Caverns on U Street. From 6 to 11 PM Tuesdays, the beers include everything from Delirium Tremens to Lucifer to a variety of Chimays. There are bottles and drafts; expect most drinks to run you between $3 and $5 after the discount.

For July's Best of Washington issue, on stands now, we surveyed more than 2,500 readers about their favorite restaurants, celebrities, nightlife, and more—plus the people and places they don’t like. Here are the results.