Not even Juliette Lewis in a wedding dress could save last night’s episode. Josh Lucas, Juliette Lewis, and Callum Keith Rennie in The Firm, “Chapter Six.” Photograph by Ian Watson/NBC.
So the last time we saw Mitch, he was bundled up in a police station being arrested for the murder of Martin (who took a dive off of a sketchy hotel balcony and ended up inadvertently redecorating the sidewalk). I say this because, like you, presumably, I have no idea what’s going on in the show these days. I can just about get my head around the single-episode storylines, but then things flash back and forward a few weeks and I’m totally, irrevocably lost. Maybe it’s because the show is so bad these days that I have to get drunk to watch it, or maybe it’s because I can’t bring myself to care—who knows? Either way, it appears Mitch is being pursued by the police, some Chicago gangsters, AND some goons hired by his boss; Sarah Holt is an innocent victim/evil murderess/Army vet (or even worse, an insurance broker); and Martin is in some way connected to some grand scheme Mitch’s firm is also embroiled in, but he really wants to be a whistleblower. Got that? Me neither. Here are the winners and losers from last night’s episode, “Chapter Six.”
Claire. In what was one of the most obvious attempts at parental manipulation we’ve ever seen, Claire managed to wrangle herself a brand new cell phone this week by disappearing at a fake DC museum. And yet savvy as she apparently is, she wasn’t remotely creeped out by the Marolto associate who came up to talk to her who knew nothing about the Han Dynasty. I mean, what a rube.
The Capital Hilton. Finally, a real Washington location! Even if it looked like stock footage, it’s so obviously not Toronto that it gets a thumbs up for now.
The Georgetown Law Society. Zing! Keep these real things coming. Well, this isn’t actually a real thing. But Georgetown is, and this is ostensibly a legal show, so I’ll give it a pass.
Marriage. Because claiming Tammy (in a short white dress) and Ray (with extra attitude) as new members is obviously going to fortify the strength and dignity of this noble institution.
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Claire. Her precociousness and faux-lawyer affect are really starting to grate on me, especially when Mitch pretends to find them as endearing as he does. Who argues with their parents using notes on 4-by-6 cards?
Tammy’s lungs. “I feel bad if I smoke three cigarettes in a row, but if I smoke them all at the same time, I feel better.” With this kind of logic, it’s no wonder the age of American exceptionalism is in decline.
Cocaine. Does it really want sniffy, sneezy, creepy Martin as its obvious posterboy?
Martin’s social life. “People who worked with Martin loved him,” said one character at the beginning of the show. Which implies no one else did.
Victor Garber. Is his career really doing so badly that he had to appear in this unfathomably terrible episode? As a racist and inept judge, no less? This is a long way from Titanic, Mr. G. Call your agent.