The Guy Fieri Takedown (With Cats), a “Portlandia” Restaurant Guide, Grimm Discoveries: Eating & Reading

Plus: The French find a new use for pain au chocolat.

By: Todd Kliman, Ann Limpert, Jessica Voelker, Anna Spiegel

Critical Mass

You’ve already read New York Times critic Pete Wells’s takedown of Guy Fieri this week. Now read it again—with cats. [Eater New York] —Anna Spiegel

And while we’re poking fun at the critics, you might as well take a cue from “Thanksgiving’s Most Helpful Man,” a.k.a Sam Sifton. Not quite as good as this, but close. [BuzzFeed Food]—AS

Though in all seriousness, there are some important questions about what kind of purpose a flaming goose egg launched at a guy like Guy serves [The Awl] —AS

“Reservations mocked”: A funny-’cause-it’s-true coded restaurant guide to Portland—part of the new Portlandia visitors manual—is on its way. [Eater National] —Jessica Voelker

Ripped From the Headlines

What Sandy revealed about New York City’s food supply chain. [Edible Geography] —Todd Kliman

Hunger for Horror

The Dave and Buster’s folks are planning a restaurant Stephen King—or at least John Wayne Gacy—would love. [Grub Street] —Ann Limpert

The Salt takes a nostalgic look back at a book of Grimm’s fairy tales in search of culinary delights such as sugar-paned windows and strawberries in the snow—and along the way, finds cannibalism, famine, and dismemberment. Sleep well, kids. [NPR] —AL

Food for Thought

Grist takes a look at Blue Ridge Produce—the Elkwood-based entity that plans to make locavore dreams a reality, and make a profit doing it. [Grist] —JV

The “link” between chocolate consumption and Nobel Laureates. [NEJM] —TK

The French right wing uses pain au chocolat to wage a cultural war. [The Guardian] —TK

At Your Service

Bon Appétit puts together a refreshingly unstuffy guide to pantry products approved by its editors and test kitchen. It mixes high (Red Boat fish sauce) and low (Skippy peanut butter), and best of all, it won’t have you running too far beyond Whole Foods and Harris Teeter. [Bon Appétit] —AL

Forgotten Foods

Wait, what happened to Magic Middles? [Buzzfeed] —JV