Newsletters

Get Well+Being delivered to your inbox every Monday Morning.

For the last few months, our Dating Diarists spilled about their dates, romances, and breakups. As we end the series, they dish on the good, the bad, and the ugly of dating so publicly.

Right before Sally Colson Cline applied for Dating Diaries, she’d been out on several dates. She thought that momentum was going to continue, but it petered out. And, while participating gave her “a little anxiety because I never had anything to report,” she did realize she was in a different place and that sometimes it’s okay to take a break. “After the breakup, I thought I’d feel like a huge player and have a revolving door of women,” says Sally. “What I found out is that I really wanted to reconnect with my friends who were sidelined by my relationship. There are things that are more important to me right now. I don’t worry about my future. I’ve been lucky in love. I’ve dated some amazing women. So I don’t worry about it.” 

 

Read More

Posted at 08:23 AM/ET, 03/03/2009 | Permalink | Comments ()
What's the real story with dating in DC? We convinced several area singles to let us follow them through the joys and travails of dating to find out. By Kelly DiNardo

Forget the weather in August—apparently it’s Washington’s dating scene that’s really steamy. According to a recent survey, this is one of the best areas in the country to be single. But is that really true? Certainly, dating in Washington has its perks—a high percentage of singles, a thriving nightlife scene, and a plethora of cultural attractions and events. It also has its challenges—balancing careers and romance in an area where for many people careers come first, dealing with the transient nature of the city, and distinguishing the line between networking and socializing. So what’s the real story?

We convinced several area singles to let us follow them through the joys and travails of dating. They include a fashionable Southern belle just out of a long-term relationship and ready to date; a Latter-day Saint in search of a serious, committed relationship; a twentysomething who loves dive bars and just wants to have fun; a thirtysomething gay man looking for love; and a recent transplant figuring out how to meet other singles. Whether gay or straight, twentysomething and never married or fortysomething and divorced, they’ll help us paint a portrait of what dating in Washington really looks like.

Each week, we’ll check in with our daters about their love lives. Occasionally, we’ll send them on challenges—from trying speed dating to going on a blind date to meeting a matchmaker. And we’ll get their opinions on everything from dating deal-breakers to geographical challenges to etiquette. Of course, we’ll want your opinion, too. So stay tuned for their tales and opinions, but weigh in with your own thoughts.

For today, meet our first dater below. And check back often; we'll be debuting the rest of our daters throughout this week.

Read More

Posted at 06:36 AM/ET, 03/03/2009 | Permalink | Comments ()

 This week, we asked our daters: How many dates do you go on before considering having sex with somebody?

Lucas Wall: I try to adhere to the three-date rule, meaning no sexual activity on the first three get-togethers. I like to have a few real dates before things get physical. Things tend to move especially rapidly in the gay community. I want to get to know somebody a little bit and gauge his long-term potential before jumping into bed. I also want to see that he’s interested in me as a whole person, not just in unzipping my pants. If someone is serious about dating as opposed to hooking up, I don’t think waiting three dates is unreasonable. And it’s fun to build up to that moment with somebody you like as opposed to going straight for the score at the end of the first date.

Read More

Posted at 10:18 AM/ET, 02/27/2009 | Permalink | Comments ()
A reader suggested we set Max and Jenn up on a blind date. They were up for the challenge and went out on a date. Here’s how it went. By Kelly DiNardo

Max and Jenn made plans to see Man on Wire at the Archives and then go out to dinner. The documentary was so popular that the Archives quickly ran out of tickets, so the two went straight to dinner.

“Max had made dinner reservations for 9 o’clock based on the movie,” says Jenn. “Instead, we walked up to Chinatown and ate early. He brought a rose, which was really sweet.”

As they walked toward Oyamel, Jenn commented on Max’s height. She told him he’d seemed kind of insecure about it in the Dating Diaries posts. “That was a good ‘know thyself’ moment,” says Max, who admits he read all of Jenn’s posts two days before their date.

Read More

Posted at 12:39 PM/ET, 02/25/2009 | Permalink | Comments ()
Each week, we check in with our Dating Diarists to see what’s happening in their lives when it comes to chemistry, romance, and maybe even love. By Kelly DiNardo

Editor’s note: In an effort to protect the privacy of our diarists’ dates, our updates are on a slight time delay.

Our Dating Diarists have shared their romantic travails with us for the last few months, but we’ll be saying farewell soon. Today, find out what’s happening in their love lives. Next week, find out what they learned from Dating Diaries.

Dana Neil again went out with the man who got food poisoning. They had a low-key dinner, and a few days later they grabbed lunch. “I like him very much,” she says. “We have a lot in common and talk very easily. I hope he feels the same way.” She went to a conference for work, and during the week she was away she dropped him an e-mail. “No response,” says Dana. “I sent him another e-mail when I got home and asked if he was okay. He responded and said he wasn’t interested romantically but that he’d like to be friends. Sometimes people mean that; sometimes people just say it. I’m not going to ask him to hang out as friends. That would seem sort of stalkerish. I think it’s up to him to ask me to do something. I’m kind of discouraged and disappointed by the whole thing.”

Not one to let a dating disappointment keep her down for too long, Dana went out with a guy who has a young son. “It was really nice,” she says. But when he invited her to go ice skating with his son, she hesitated. “I’m not sure if I want to do young kids again,” says Dana. “I’ve got this freedom that I can do whatever I want, and that’s nice. I put a lot into my kids and didn’t have a serious relationship for a long time. This is my time. He understands that, and he just wants me to let him know if this is an issue for me. He’s being very good about it. He’s a catch.”

Read More

Posted at 11:29 AM/ET, 02/23/2009 | Permalink | Comments ()
This week we ask our daters: What’s the best pickup line you’ve heard? The worst? By Kelly DiNardo

 Meet our datersDana Neill | Sally Colson Cline | Michael Amesquita | Kate Searby | Max Schwartz | Lucas Wall | Jenn Heilman

Kate Searby: The worst line I ever heard was on a flight from DC to San Francisco. The guy sitting next to me motioned for me to loan him my pen. I handed it to him, and he scribbled something on the newspaper he’d been reading. Then he tapped me on the shoulder and motioned for me to look at the picture he’d drawn. It was a cartoon of a little boy with a thought bubble above his head that read: “Are you from Tennessee?” I said, “No, I’m from California. Why?” Silently, the guy drew another thought bubble above the cartoon boy’s head that said, “Because you’re the only TEN-I-See!!!”

 

Read More

Posted at 09:21 AM/ET, 02/20/2009 | Permalink | Comments ()

This past Valentine’s Day, Jason Tesauro, coauthor of The Modern Gentleman and The Modern Lover, hosted “The Art of Flirting” at Ici Urban Bistro. The event promised “to set off sparks amongst singles and bring back the butterflies in couples.” We sent Max Schwartz and Michael Amesquita to test it out. Here’s what they discovered.

Max and Michael met at a bar before heading to the event. They were attending together for moral support, not as dates. Unfortunately, the organizers missed that small detail. After an introductory cocktail hour in which Max and Michael realized they were two of only five single people at the event, they were seated together for dinner. Just the two of them.

Read More

Posted at 05:53 AM/ET, 02/20/2009 | Permalink | Comments ()
Each week, we check in with our Dating Diarists to see what’s happening in their lives when it comes to chemistry, romance, and maybe even love. By Kelly DiNardo

Meet our datersDana Neill | Sally Colson Cline | Michael Amesquita | Kate Searby | Max Schwartz | Lucas Wall | Jenn Heilman   

Editor’s note: In an effort to protect the privacy of our diarists’ dates, our updates are on a slight time delay.

Valentine’s Day has passed, but our daters are still hoping Cupid aims his arrow their way.

Kate Searby is still smitten with the producer she met at Tryst. “He has a really big heart,” says Kate. “I don’t think he thinks I’m silly for being interested in human rights. He’s really adventurous. We have that in common. He’s an interested, compassionate person. I really enjoy spending time with him. I think we have amazing chemistry. Everything feels really comfortable. At the same time, we haven’t had any talks about being exclusive. As much as I like him, I’m not sure I’m ready to go there.”

Kate might not be ready to go there, but she did end things with the guy from California because of her feelings for the producer.

Read More

Posted at 01:18 PM/ET, 02/17/2009 | Permalink | Comments ()

Meet our datersDana Neill | Sally Colson Cline | Michael Amesquita | Kate Searby | Max Schwartz | Lucas Wall | Jenn Heilman  

This week we ask our daters: How do you know someone is just not that into you? What are the signals you try to send someone to tell them you’re not that into them?
 
Dana Neil: On the first few dates, I can tell he’s not into me if he doesn’t touch my hand or arm while we talk or if he doesn’t ask questions about me. Later on, I can tell when he doesn’t call much or if behaviors change and there doesn’t seem to be a reason why.
 
If I’m not into someone, then I try not to send signals. I like to be clear and honest with someone. I just think it’s so much easier for everyone. I know I’d rather hear it straight up than try to guess. It may be more difficult to do, but it’s the best way.

Read More

Posted at 07:12 AM/ET, 02/13/2009 | Permalink | Comments ()
Each week, we check in with our Dating Diarists to see what’s happening in their lives when it comes to chemistry, romance, and maybe even love. By Kelly DiNardo

Meet our datersDana Neill | Sally Colson Cline | Michael Amesquita | Kate Searby | Max Schwartz | Lucas Wall | Jenn Heilman   

Editor’s note: In an effort to protect the privacy of our diarists’ dates, our updates are on a slight time delay.


Forget the love-life drama of He’s Just Not That Into You—our daters are navigating the real-life romantic waters.

Dana Neil went on a second date with a man who responded to her Craigslist post about the economy, but it didn’t go well. “I told him I needed to swing by my house and check on my dog, who wasn’t feeling well, so I might be a few minutes late,” she says. “He said that was fine and he’d just wait for me at the bar. I was 15 minutes late, but when I got there he said he’d been there for more than an hour. He got drunk and started talking about his religious beliefs and questioning mine. I was on the defensive. I did get an apology e-mail the next day. I know he’s going through a really stressful time at work, but I don’t know. I was kind of looking forward to this guy. We really hit it off and then this happened. It was a let-down.” 

Read More

Posted at 09:45 AM/ET, 02/09/2009 | Permalink | Comments ()