We thought last week’s presidential debate was the lowest point in American democracy. El. Oh. El. In a mere seven days, the White House has become a coronavirus hotspot, Melania Trump was caught on tape admitting she didn’t care about the children at the border, maskless MAGA protesters have taken to the streets around the country, and, oh yeah, our Covid-positive POTUS took a joy-ride around Walter Reed Hospital and tweeted “don’t be afraid” of the very disease that might be killing him if Claudia Conway’s TikToks prove more reliable than what Trump’s doctors are telling the press (and they very well might).
Because THAT wasn’t enough to process, the vice presidential debate is still happening in Salt Lake City at 9 PM EST on Wednesday, moderated by USA Today’s Susan Page. Drinking will be in order. Grab a fifth (or a keg) and play along. We’ve got a bingo card as well for the teetotalers.
Drink When Pence:
- Talks about how he’s a Christian. Drink twice if he explicitly describes himself as “A Christian, conservative, and Republican, in that order.”
- Mentions “Mother.” As in his wife, not his actual mother.
- Shakes his head while Harris criticizes Trump
- Brings up how Biden and Harris fought in the primary debates
- Emphasizes the need to “restore American values”
Drink When Harris:
- Mentions how close she was with Beau Biden
- Criticizes Pence on his record as head of the coronavirus task force
- Says “nobody is above the law”
- Grills Pence on Trump’s response to his own Covid diagnosis
- Says we need to end systemic racism but fails to explain how
Drink When Either
- Says “the United States of America”
- Precedes talking about their home state with “the great state of”
- Describes their running mate’s health as “excellent,” “fantastic,” or likewise
- Interrupts the other (advanced version, please drink responsibly)
- Directly insults the other (advanced version, please drink responsibly)
Chug for five seconds if:
- Pence looks visibly uncomfortable trying to defend a Trump position
- Harris waters down a position so much you’re unsure of what her platform is
Take a shot/finish your drink if:
- Trump becomes incapacitated and Mike Pence becomes acting President of the United states mid-debate
- Debate officials realize it’s insane to not have Pence quarantining given his attendance at the Amy Coney Barrett Rose Garden ceremony and cancel the whole thing
Click here to download a printable PDF of the Washingtonian VP Debate Drinking Game:
Click here to download a printable version of the Washingtonian VP Debate Bingo Board:
Jane is a Chicago transplant who now calls Cleveland Park her home. Before joining Washingtonian, she wrote for Smithsonian Magazine and the Chicago Sun-Times. She is a graduate of Northwestern University, where she studied journalism and opera.
Hannah is Washingtonian’s Social Media Producer. She’s a proud Kentuckian who lives in Petworth with her bunny Ruthie.
