Missed Connections: Improper Use Edition

Craigslist is a catchall for modern society’s wants and needs, where users can find everything from used bed sheets to luxury apartment rentals. However, we’re of the mind that some requests are better left offline—or at least out of the Missed Connections section. Where most are looking for love, some posters this week are looking for fashion tips and ways to avoid bad luck. Perhaps we need an intervention to remind the public of what this section is for.

True Love (Fairfax)
Date: 2010-12-14, 8:15PM EST

You opened it. Good luck. Tonight at midnight your true love will realize they love you. You will get the shock of your life tomorrow a good one if you break the chain you will be cursed with relationship problems for the next 2 years. Karma if there is someone you once loved or still do and cant get them off of your mind re-post this in another city within the next 5 minutes its amazing how this stuff works. If you truly miss someone a past love and cant seem to get them off of your mind then re-post This in a different city

Chain letters on Craigslist? Really? Although by posting it in this column, we’re probably perpetuating the problem.

you just got rejected from duke–m4w–21 (tysons)
Date: 2010-12-14, 10:23PM EST

Hey,
I seriously doubt you’ll see this but I just waited on you and your friend and you told me about your day, but left before I could give you my number. You were wearing a unc hoodie, you still want it? What restaurant?

Reminding a girl of her recent failures might not be the best way to win her heart.

attractive blond in jeans early Friday afternoon near 18th and L–m4w–27 (Dupont)
Date: 2010-12-13, 5:57PM EST

Am actually a straight female who was noticing your jeans on Friday and wanted to ask where you got them but was accompanied by four male coworkers, so wasn’t interested in making it awkward!

I seem to remember you had medium/long blond hair and a casual, dark jacket.

I can’t remember if it was on 17th or L or thereabouts, but it was early on Friday afternoon (between 1 and 2:30).

Your jeans were on the lighter side but not really light or faded or washed out. They seemed to be fairly solid and slightly brighter than most jeans. They had fairly big back pockets without any designs on them, and they looked like they fit you extremely well!

I’ve been looking for them for the past several days and should have just asked you. Would love to get a pair.

Our favorite part is that she made this a man-seeking-woman post.

Gas Station in 2005–w4m (DC)
Date: 2010-12-12, 1:57PM EST

Today I woke up, and I don’t know what made me think of you. Perhaps it was the pidder padder of the rain hitting my window, or my thirst for an Arizona can tea. I met you many years ago in 2005 to be exact, what we had was great while it lasted. How we met? You were at the Gas Station in Southeast DC and there I was with my umbrella and Arizona drink. Life was great back then. You taught me so much, without you even realizing. That summer ended badly for me, for us. I never got the chance to tell you how I really felt, and until now I have been angry, hurt, and resentful. Since then I wanted to drive by your old place to see if you still lived there, but I’m sure it would have been creepy and really awkward. Anyhow I want you to know that I forgive you for not being there when I needed you, for not wanting to be there for me. Hope this sets me free. If this finds you or you stumble across this, just remember Trio. Goodbye DonJuan (Mann)!

Missed Connections: always reminding us that love really can happen anywhere.

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Mollie Reilly