Reading Between the Lines of DC’s Mayoral Candidates
At September’s candidate forums, expect Muriel Bowser to prod David Catania’s famous temper as he attacks her positions—if she risks any. For now, DC’s mayoral hopefuls require translation.
What she means: Watch me run away from questions to deprive my opponent of the microphone.
“I appreciated a very genuine handshake that [Vince Gray] offered
to me this morning.”
What she means: The mayor and I revile each other.
“If you’re not married at 42, people think there’s something wrong
with you. I date all the time. I am private, that’s for sure.”
What she means: No, I am not gay.
“I don’t think everything has to change in the government”
What she means: Hey, black voters who turned out my political mentor: I’m no
Adrian Fenty.
“You’re not mayor until you are mayor.”
What she means: Quit worrying about my not seeming “mayoral.”
What David Catania says:
“It’s past time for the candidates of this race to engage in a public discussion about the future or our city.”
What he means: Help! Until Bowser agrees to debate, I got no game.
“A label alone never puts food on the table . . . never educates
children, and it doesn’t provide health care.”
What he means: Because I’m running against a Democrat in one of the nation’s
bluest cities, my only prayer is to convince DC voters to abandon
their party.
“People understand that even if they don’t necessarily agree with
me all the time . . . I roll up my sleeves and I’m serious about
getting solutions.”
What he means: My hard work makes up for my embarrassing lack of civility.
“Let me be clear—I will not be seeking reelection as a member of
the council. I am running for mayor of the District of Columbia.”
What he means: After 17 years, I couldn’t stand another term on the DC
Council.
“The [Democratic] primary was about who shouldn’t be mayor, not
who should be.”
What he means: I really wanted to run against Vince Gray.
What Carol Schwartz says “I just want you to
take me a little bit more seriously.”
What Carol Schwartz means . . . Before I
disappear again to Rehoboth.
This article appears in the September 2014 issue of Washingtonian.
Reading Between the Lines of DC’s Mayoral Candidates
At September’s candidate forums, expect Muriel Bowser to prod David Catania’s famous temper as he attacks her positions—if she risks any. For now, DC’s mayoral hopefuls require translation.
What Muriel Bowser says:
“I don’t run away from people asking questions.”
What she means: Watch me run away from questions to deprive my opponent of the microphone.
“I appreciated a very genuine handshake that [Vince Gray] offered
to me this morning.”
What she means: The mayor and I revile each other.
“If you’re not married at 42, people think there’s something wrong
with you. I date all the time. I am private, that’s for sure.”
What she means: No, I am not gay.
“I don’t think everything has to change in the government”
What she means: Hey, black voters who turned out my political mentor: I’m no
Adrian Fenty.
“You’re not mayor until you are mayor.”
What she means: Quit worrying about my not seeming “mayoral.”
What David Catania says:
“It’s past time for the candidates of this race to engage in a public discussion about the future or our city.”
What he means: Help! Until Bowser agrees to debate, I got no game.
“A label alone never puts food on the table . . . never educates
children, and it doesn’t provide health care.”
What he means: Because I’m running against a Democrat in one of the nation’s
bluest cities, my only prayer is to convince DC voters to abandon
their party.
“People understand that even if they don’t necessarily agree with
me all the time . . . I roll up my sleeves and I’m serious about
getting solutions.”
What he means: My hard work makes up for my embarrassing lack of civility.
“Let me be clear—I will not be seeking reelection as a member of
the council. I am running for mayor of the District of Columbia.”
What he means: After 17 years, I couldn’t stand another term on the DC
Council.
“The [Democratic] primary was about who shouldn’t be mayor, not
who should be.”
What he means: I really wanted to run against Vince Gray.
What Carol Schwartz says “I just want you to
take me a little bit more seriously.”
What Carol Schwartz means . . . Before I
disappear again to Rehoboth.
This article appears in the September 2014 issue of Washingtonian.
Most Popular in News & Politics
See a Spotted Lanternfly? Here’s What to Do.
Meet DC’s 2025 Tech Titans
Patel Dined at Rao’s After Kirk Shooting, Nonviolent Offenses Led to Most Arrests During Trump’s DC Crackdown, and You Should Try These Gougères
The “MAGA Former Dancer” Named to a Top Job at the Kennedy Center Inherits a Troubled Program
Trump Travels One Block From White House, Declares DC Crime-Free; Barron Trump Moves to Town; and GOP Begins Siege of Home Rule
Washingtonian Magazine
September Issue: Style Setters
View IssueSubscribe
Follow Us on Social
Follow Us on Social
Related
Why a Lost DC Novel Is Getting New Attention
These Confusing Bands Aren’t Actually From DC
Fiona Apple Wrote a Song About This Maryland Court-Watching Effort
The Confusing Dispute Over the Future of the Anacostia Playhouse
More from News & Politics
Administration Steps Up War on Comedians, Car Exhibition on the Mall Canceled After Tragedy, and Ted Leonsis Wants to Buy D.C. United
What Happens After We Die? These UVA Researchers Are Investigating It.
Why a Lost DC Novel Is Getting New Attention
Bondi Irks Conservatives With Plan to Limit “Hate Speech,” DC Council Returns to Office, and Chipotle Wants Some Money Back
GOP Candidate Quits Virginia Race After Losing Federal Contracting Job, Trump Plans Crackdown on Left Following Kirk’s Death, and Theatre Week Starts Thursday
5 Things to Know About “Severance” Star Tramell Tillman
See a Spotted Lanternfly? Here’s What to Do.
Patel Dined at Rao’s After Kirk Shooting, Nonviolent Offenses Led to Most Arrests During Trump’s DC Crackdown, and You Should Try These Gougères