If you’re already deep into DC TikTok, you probably know about the account @marks_picture_diary. But if not, let us introduce you: It’s a TikTok that parodies a certain type of 20- and 30-something’s life in Washington, covering sex, dating, consultant bros, waiting in line at the 14th Street TJs, and the black hole that is Shirlington.
Many of its TikToks are formulated a la Sex in the City, with the show’s theme music playing over a Carrie Bradshaw-esque “I couldn’t help but wonder…” monologue. Some of these focus on DC —trying to get a table at Le Dip without a reservation, Barbour jackets at Dacha—but the most on-the-nose ones are about Clarendon, where it appears the dudes waiting in line to crush Miller Lites at Spider Kelly’s are as plentiful as pink shorts at a Vineyard Vines outlet.
We DMd the guy behind the account, who also stars in them and is seemingly named Mark, but he couldn’t talk to us because he didn’t want to get in trouble with his job. Spoken like a true DC consultant!
But even though maybe-named-Mark wouldn’t chat, we still figured you needed to know about his videos. We rounded up some of our favorites for you below:
Waking up in Fairfax just hits different