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Craigslist Adventures: Seeking a Wedding Date
Got a dress and an education? This guy would like to take you to a wedding. By Tanya Pai
Comments () | Published May 16, 2013

In a story that is sadly not an exact retread of the 2005 rom-com starring Debra Messing and Dermot Mulroney, a helpful reader passed along a link to a Craigslist ad posted by a man seeking a wedding date for this weekend. The poster, a self-proclaimed “clean man” in Northwest DC, is seeking a young-but-not-too-young female companion for a celebration in Lexington. He helpfully lists some pros for this situation, including:

—Free food and booze

—The opportunity to wear a dress

—Being able to “pop n lock it” with him on the dance floor

—The fact that “you only yolo once”

However, he fails to address the potential downsides, such as:

—It’s bad form to randomly show up at the wedding of someone you’ve never met (hey, that’s also the plot of a 2005 movie!) 

—Once you show up at said wedding, you’ll have to either a) invent a backstory that’s both believable and simple enough to remember after enjoying copious amounts of that free booze, or b) explain to everyone all night how you are there because you responded to a Craigslist ad and probably get a lot of looks like this.

—Also what if you catch the bouquet? AWKward, amirite?

—Also come on, man, “you only yolo once” is redundant

To apply, all you have to do is e-mail him a selfie, a résumé, and your favorite color—you can keep your medical and criminal histories private.


Do you know this guy? Did you reply to this ad? Are you the one getting married this weekend? Let us know how it turns out in the comments!

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  • Bianca

    YOU ONLY YOLO ONCE IS A WORKAHOLICS QUOTE, come awwwwwwwn

  • Christy

    How is it bad form to go to a wedding where you don't know the bride and groom? Before we started dating, my now boyfriend brought me to his brother's wedding...I didn't know the bride and groom! Plus, I've been to plenty of weddings where someone just brings a friend that doesn't know anyone there!

  • bob

    I agree Christy. Odds are 50/50 that any wedding you attend will end in divorce, so I'm not sure the whole "it's her day" stuff applies anymore. It's everyone's day, and the bride would be happier by thinking of it that way, imo. The wedding-day obsessed bride where everything must be just so is... I don't know, flawed. Expectations and all that old-school need for perfection just suck the life out of social affairs, and I don't think people under 40 are into it anymore. If online dating sites including CL is how you find your dates, then that's how you find your dates. Would Match.com be acceptable? What's the difference? CL allows the guy to write something witty, straight to the point, and reach a wider audience. So the bride tells this guy it's bad form, which means now he has to choose from the women he already knows. Just one problem there -- he's now bringing a friend rather than an actual date, which may very well be far more awkward than telling a few people you met a real date you have a chance at love with on Craigslist. But, hey, God forbid we make someone else feel awkward for three seconds when we could make ourselves feel awkward all night, and waste an opportunity to find true love.

  • Keenan

    You are reminding me of people who do not get a joke.

    1. You seem like a downer. My god you would have to invent a backstory! Heavens me! How dreadful!

    2. Seriously, could you not tell that "you only yolo once" was written in a tongue-in-cheek way. (By the way, the whole post was cheeky).

  • Tanya

    I'm sorry you think I seem like a downer! It IS unfortunate when people don't get the joke.

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Posted at 03:26 PM/ET, 05/16/2013 RSS | Print | Permalink | Comments () | Washingtonian.com Blogs