News & Politics

Missed Connections: Sanity and/or Fear Edition

Priests, missing friends, hot tickets, and rocking-chair romances

With the perfect storm of Halloween, the Marine Corps Marathon, Howard University’s homecoming, and the Stewart/Colbert rally all hitting Washington last weekend, it’s no surprise that romance sprung up. Clever signs, a cross-dressing take on a Glee icon, and a certain classic computer-game character set hearts a-flutter, while a crowded train breeds what could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship.

rally: “down with this sort of thing”–m4w–25 (dc)
Date: 2010-10-31, 6:34PM EDT

Me: dressed as priest, holding sign “down with this sort of thing”
You: saw me and want to talk about the rally or whatever.

I’m not actually ordained.

Thanks for clearing that up.

Rally- “IS THIS THE LINE FOR JUSTIN BIEBER TICKETS?!??” sign–w4m (DC Rally Bieber)
Date: 2010-11-01, 1:06AM EDT

You had the funniest sign at the rally- I tried to get closer to talk to you but the crowd was too big.

Rally signs—the new pickup line?


Crowded trains feel like home to me. (Dunn-Loring to the Rallies)
Date: 2010-10-31, 6:47PM EDT

This is not a romantic connection.
We started talking on the metro going to the rally and when we realized we wouldn’t be able to find our friends, you suggested we stick together. So we did. I’m assuming you’re married since you had a silver wedding ring on your finger, which is good, because what I really need right now is a platonic guy friend. I haven’t been around here very long and I’m not used to living without my brothers and I think a friend would do me good. You were really friendly and didn’t laugh at me for thinking Kareem Abdul Jabbar was Urkel. That’s the sort of attitude I’m looking for in a friend.

I might be the only person in DC posting a missed connection for a potential brother-replacement.

This is sweet, but does anyone really peruse Craigslist seeking platonic relationships?


We both said: “Don’t Stomp On My Head”–m4w–29 (The Mall)
Date: 2010-10-31, 9:14PM EDT

You were at the Rally. We saw each other after it ended, as we were very slowly inching along with the crowd. We were both carrying signs that said “DON’T STOMP ON MY HEAD” with that rattlesnake on it. I’d expected to see more people with the same joke, but though I saw a bunch of signs with that little rattlesnake (i.e. “OMG SNAKE! AHHH!!!”), I only saw one other person who made this ripped-from-the-headlines head-stomping joke. You. And your sign was more elaborately designed than mine. But—though I only saw it for a split second (which was weird, because the crowd was moving so slow—where did you go??)—i do think that you, like me, didn’t quite make the joke totally work, because we (if, that is, my memory serves and you did this too) missed the fact that original rattlesnake was a threat, like as in, don’t tread on me or i’ll bite the shit out of your redcoat ankle, whereas our message was one of non-violence, a simple request for others to refrain from assault in reaction to one’s own exercised right to speak freely, just don’t stomp on my head, nor tase me, bro. So maybe we should have drawn less threatening snakes on our signs. Or some totally unthreatening animal, like a mole. But that would have been even harder to get, joke-wise, and yet anyways as it were I think you and I actually did a better job than most of the signs out there, which were a little weak. Not all of them, there were some good ones—like the one that said “THE END IS NOT FOR A WHILE” or the giant one that said “THE SIGN IS TOO DAMN BIG”—but by and large it was a reminder that it’s hard to be funny, even though it seems really easy coming from the people we’d all gone to see, for whom I’m really deeply grateful, just as I was proud to stand with a couple hundred thousand people who at least find the same ridiculous things to be as funny as I do. Exasperating and sad but also funny. And one of them, you, even made the same sign I made. So. Wanna hang out and watch the Daily Show some time?

Perhaps the most in-depth analysis of a fake protest sign in history.

omg i need help finding carmen sandeigo–m4w–25 (rally)
Date: 2010-10-31, 12:40AM EDT

Can any one tell me where in the world is carmen sandeigo? i saw her at the rally but she ran off before i had a shot of saying any thing to her. if any one has any info on the ware abouts can you contact your local ACME agent with details.

All that was missing was a Rockapella soundtrack.


Cute girl from Chicago–35 (Rally to Restore Sanity)
Date: 2010-11-01, 1:52AM EDT

I was standing in front of you and your friends with my “We’re not going to Protest” sign and my “Bad Spellers of the World, UNTIE” shirt. You used my rocking chair as a coat rack for your purple sweatshirt. I regret not asking for some way to get in touch with you. You’ve been on my mind since the morning of the Rally.

A rocking chair at the rally? No wonder there was no room on the Mall.