News & Politics

Missed Connections: Unusual Places Edition

Star-crossed Craigslisters find love in the oddest places.

After awhile, Craigslist Missed Connections tend to blend together. They all seem to involve flirtatious glances on the Orange Line, small talk in an elevator, and admiring stares at the gym. This week, Washingtonians look for love in (slightly) less-obvious places—Panera Bread, a laundry room. The lesson? When looking for love in unusual places, you might just find a philosophical companion.

panera bread–cute cute cute–m4w (arlington panera bread)
Date: 2010-08-02, 12:13AM EDT
All because of you, today was a mighty fine day!
While exactly who you are, I can not say
But the total package of YOU that came my way
Made this day, today, a mighty fine day!
You are my missed connection
Hoping I am yours too
Suffering from a misconception
until I hear from you!
Brown skin, like mine, but somewhat darker
we both had laptops and company to bother
you were in the comfy seat, i was at the table
focusing on my computer work, i was not able!
but still in deed, i have to say
that pretty smile of yours . .made today, this day, a mighty fine day!

This is sweet, but the English teacher in us gives the poem an F due to a lack of order or precision in the rhyme scheme. Step up your game, Panera eater.

Red Line toward Shady Grove on Monday evening–m4w
Date: 2010-08-03, 11:41PM EDT
We were going toward Shady Grove on Monday around 8:15pm.
I asked if the “Express” paper was yours.
You said “no.”
I would like to meet you.
Please write me.

It looks like he’s applying an “Express” attitude even to his Missed Connections post.

yoga on M st nw–m4w–30 (georgetown)
Date: 2010-08-04, 3:10PM EDT
We met as I was headed to yoga class. There were two children with you, and I only had the time to tell you I would post on this ad. by 4pm.
I would like to see you again sometime. Would you?

I’m pretty sure it takes less time to say a name and phone number than to explain the concept behind Craigslist classifieds.

Fairfax Hospital Yesterday About 3pm–m4m–44 (Fairfax Hosp.)
Date: 2010-08-04, 7:52PM EDT
Had sonogram on my legs. if you git thys email me with pic

Perhaps you should just call your doctor and ask for the sonogram picture more directly.

Dolphin Guy–m4m (Laundry Room–17th and R)
Date: 2010-08-04, 8:46PM EDT
Sorry for making the loud dolphin noise right in your face. I thought you were my niece. Does that explain things?

Only if your niece enjoys a dolphin-centric soundtrack during laundry day.

Kierkegaard at the Bailey’s Crossroads Trader Joe’s–m4w (The Freezer Aisle)
Date: 2010-08-05, 3:05PM EDT
That very aisle indeed.
Where we exchanged a somewhat pointed glance.
What was behind that glance?
Was it umbrage? Discontent? Antipathy?
I don’t know.
Even so, we might have struck up an erudite and witty conversation, we two.
But standing within four feet of seven pints of mango sorbet while discussing Kierkegaard and the late-classical sonata form would’ve been somewhat perverse, not to mention misguided.

As Kierkegaard once said, “At the bottom of enmity between strangers lies . . . a craving for the last pint of mango sorbet.”

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