In a story that is sadly not an exact retread of the 2005 rom-com starring Debra Messing and Dermot Mulroney, a helpful reader passed along a link to a Craigslist ad posted by a man seeking a wedding date for this weekend. The poster, a self-proclaimed “clean man” in Northwest DC, is seeking a young-but-not-too-young female companion for a celebration in Lexington. He helpfully lists some pros for this situation, including:
—Free food and booze
—The opportunity to wear a dress
—Being able to “pop n lock it” with him on the dance floor
—The fact that “you only yolo once”
However, he fails to address the potential downsides, such as:
—It’s bad form to randomly show up at the wedding of someone you’ve never met (hey, that’s also the plot of a 2005 movie!)
—Once you show up at said wedding, you’ll have to either a) invent a backstory that’s both believable and simple enough to remember after enjoying copious amounts of that free booze, or b) explain to everyone all night how you are there because you responded to a Craigslist ad and probably get a lot of looks like this.
—Also what if you catch the bouquet? AWKward, amirite?
—Also come on, man, “you only yolo once” is redundant
To apply, all you have to do is e-mail him a selfie, a résumé, and your favorite color—you can keep your medical and criminal histories private.
Do you know this guy? Did you reply to this ad? Are you the one getting married this weekend? Let us know how it turns out in the comments!
Craigslist Adventures: Seeking a Wedding Date
Got a dress and an education? This guy would like to take you to a wedding.
In a story that is sadly not an exact retread of the 2005 rom-com starring Debra Messing and Dermot Mulroney, a helpful reader passed along a link to a Craigslist ad posted by a man seeking a wedding date for this weekend. The poster, a self-proclaimed “clean man” in Northwest DC, is seeking a young-but-not-too-young female companion for a celebration in Lexington. He helpfully lists some pros for this situation, including:
—Free food and booze
—The opportunity to wear a dress
—Being able to “pop n lock it” with him on the dance floor
—The fact that “you only yolo once”
However, he fails to address the potential downsides, such as:
—It’s bad form to randomly show up at the wedding of someone you’ve never met (hey, that’s also the plot of a 2005 movie!)
—Once you show up at said wedding, you’ll have to either a) invent a backstory that’s both believable and simple enough to remember after enjoying copious amounts of that free booze, or b) explain to everyone all night how you are there because you responded to a Craigslist ad and probably get a lot of looks like this.
—Also what if you catch the bouquet? AWKward, amirite?
—Also come on, man, “you only yolo once” is redundant
To apply, all you have to do is e-mail him a selfie, a résumé, and your favorite color—you can keep your medical and criminal histories private.
Do you know this guy? Did you reply to this ad? Are you the one getting married this weekend? Let us know how it turns out in the comments!
Most Popular in News & Politics
Every Bus Line in DC Is Changing This Weekend. Here’s What to Know.
8 Takeaways From Usha Vance’s Interview With Meghan McCain
Yet Another Anti-Trump Statue Has Shown Up on the National Mall
Another Mysterious Anti-Trump Statue Has Appeared on the National Mall
A Cult Classic of Cannabis Brands Is Making Its DC Debut
Washingtonian Magazine
July Issue: The "Best Of" Issue
View IssueSubscribe
Follow Us on Social
Follow Us on Social
Related
How Would a New DC Stadium Compare to the Last One?
The Culture of Lacrosse Is More Complex Than People Think
Did Television Begin in Dupont Circle?
Kings Dominion’s Wild New Coaster Takes Flight in Virginia
More from News & Politics
Speaker Johnson’s Megabill Prayers Likely to Be Answered Before Holiday Weekend, Wrongly Deported Maryland Man Faced Abuse in El Salvador Prison, and We Found Some Yummy Nepalese Food
Pardoned J6er Will Join Ed Martin’s Justice Department Office, Trump Outlines Hypothetical Alligator Escape Plan, and We Have Fireworks Show Recommendations
The “World’s Largest Outdoor Museum” Is Coming to DC. Here’s a Preview.
A Cult Classic of Cannabis Brands Is Making Its DC Debut
The Commanders Wine and Dine DC Council Members; GOP Senator Suggests Tax Language Was “Airdropped” Into Spending Bill; and Trump Wants DOGE to Investigate Musk
100 Reasons to Love DC Right Now
How DC’s Attorney General Got So Good at Double Dutch
DC Council Ponders New Way to Expel Trayon White, the GOP’s Budget Bill Advances, and We Found You Some Tacos With Ethiopian Flair