Eating & Reading: Squirrel Burgers, the Best Yelp Takedown Ever, and Preparing for POTUS

Ten of the tastiest stories we're reading this week.

Whaaat? You want to make a burger out of me? Photograph via Shutterstock.

Behold, the squirrel burger challenge—a.k.a. every dog’s biggest dream come true. [Time] —Ann Limpert

Is your home redolent of roasting Indian corn, gourds, and other root vegetables each fall? Then you may be a perfect match for Mr. Autumn Man. [The Onion] —Anna Spiegel

So “putrid soybean goop” doesn’t sound like the best way to start the day, but the New York Times roundup of what kids around the world eat for breakfast is pretty hunger-inducing (not to mention adorable). [New York Times] —AS

Plenty of restaurants have fought snotty customers on Yelp, but this may be the best takedown yet. [Eater] —AS

“Next time you drink your pumpkin spice latte, just remember: nothing is real, and nothing matters. Maybe.” Perhaps the most esoteric approach to the pumpkin spice phenomenon I have ever encountered. [Critical Theory] —Tanya Pai

While President Obama is an unabashed fan of the humble hamburger, he also enjoys trendy restaurants. Here’s how a chef at one such hip eatery prepares for a visit from POTUS. [Grub Street] —TP

So, which intern are we going to send out to pick up Cal Tort’s limited-time only cheeseburger burritos? Obviously we’re going to splurge and add bacon for another dollar. [QSR Magazine] —Benjamin Freed

A group of intelligent law-enforcement officials in Georgia dispatched heavily armed deputies, drug-sniffing dogs, and a helicopter to a retired man’s farm so they could bust him for…okra, which apparently looks like weed. Or Smoke-ra. [First We Feast] —BF

This cleanly designed Upworthy knockoff aims to provide millennials with information that will make their consumer choices more sustainable, especially those about food. You’ll groan loudly when you hear who’s behind it. [Guardian] —BF

Washingtonians are hyped over the new Bullfrog Bagels spot on H Street, but some people will never believe anything can compare to a New York bagel. Well, one guy in Denver might prove them wrong after reverse-engineering the famed NYC water that’s supposedly the secret ingredient to a perfect bagel. [The Atlantic Citylab] —Michael Gaynor