The Trump team induced many comparisons to Veep (and probably a few worries that people might be hallucinating when they read the news) when it held an incomprehensibly weird press conference at Four Seasons Total Landscaping in Philadelphia. Since then, we’ve learned that people have been calling an adult bookshop nearby and asking whether Rudy Giuliani was there, that one of the people who stood up with Giuliani is a convicted sex offender, and that Corey Lewandowski has insisted holding the press conference in a parking lot rather than Philly’s Four Seasons Hotel was the plan all along.
Now, as Trump’s team insists it will continue to fight the results of last week’s presidential election and his allies cite incoherent conspiracy theories, we thought it would be helpful to compile a list of places named Four Seasons that aren’t DC’s Four Seasons Hotel in case they need venues for future conferences, which, and I cannot stress this enough, Washingtonian would dearly love to send reporters to.
Name: Four Seasons Nails & Spa
Location: 468 K Street, Northwest
Pros: Open during the pandemic, close to RPM Italian, short walk to the “Sexy Safeway”
Cons: None—and most area news organizations could get reporters there within a half hour.
Name: Four Seasons Restaurant
Location: Eden Center, Falls Church
Pros: Washington Post critic Tim Carman recommends the whole catfish and bun bo Hue.
Cons: Dizzying array of great food at Eden Center may distract attendees.
Location: 15730 Crabbs Branch Way, Rockville
Pros: “A” rating from Angie’s list; would continue a theme somewhat.
Cons: Proximity to I-270 may stir some unpleasant associations.
Location: 21100 Dulles Town Circle, Sterling
Pros: Great variety of hair services augmented by spa therapies; Dulles Town Center has a carousel.
Cons: None that we can think of.