What’s the one rule you need to know before moving to DC? Vice DC correspondent Alexis Johnson posed that very question to Twitter on Monday, yielding a viral wave of responses from the city’s highly-opinionated populace. Here are some of the takes:
Stand on the correct side of the escalator—or else.
On all escalators, especially metro, you stand on the right side and walk on the left. Do not break this rule.
— Robyn Swirling (@RSwirling) February 9, 2021
on the metro escalators, you stand on the right, walk on the left, or else you die
— arya hodjat (@arya_kidding_me) February 9, 2021
STAND ON THE RIGHT OF THE DAMN METRO ESCALATORS, FOR THE LOVE OF GOD.
Also, the Smithsonian is both singular and plural.
Oh, and WELCOME to the District! 🙂— Amanda Elizabeth (@AnEloquentDane) February 9, 2021
people will literally scream at you if you’re on the left side of the metro escalator and not sprinting up
— Connor Perrett (@connorperrett) February 9, 2021
Show love for DC’s Ethiopian and Salvadoran spots.
Sorry, not just one but… Malcolm X park on Sunday afternoons (when the weather gets better/maybe post pandemic); pupusas and Habesha food; the National Arboretum
But most important: people who say “no one is actually FROM DC” are not to be trusted on anything about DC
— Elahe Izadi (@ElaheIzadi) February 9, 2021
When things open back up, stand to the right and walk to the left in escalators. The Ethiopian and Salvadoran mom and pop restaurants are the crown jewels of this city.
— Shreya Singh (@shresing) February 9, 2021
Ok, but seriously, it's DC, make your own rules. Ethiopian food is a must. Mumbo sauce is… DC. I don't like condiments so w/e. 930 club when it's back. Selfie at the Wash Monument. B&O towpath for a run or long walk. Suburbs are fine!
— Emperor Goblin (@EmperorADB) February 9, 2021
Baked and wired for cupcakes. @andpizza for, well, pizza. Ethiopian food scene is ? Summer = late nights at the monuments and jazz in the gardens. As for the metro…eh, good luck?
— Zinhle Essamuah (@simplyzinhle) February 9, 2021
DC's best things aren't the "culture" – it's not like that. Instead, it's the subcultures of the District. Go-go. Basement house shows. Rock Creek Park. Ethiopian food. Cycling. Sailing. Theatre. Activism. There's a million.
— Dustin (@CIVIL1AN) February 9, 2021
Explore the city by foot.
this isn’t so much a rule as a suggestion: get some good walking shoes and you can see so much of the city by foot! + find your nearest farmers market, it’ll bring you so much joy! (welcome to the city!! you’ll love it here ❤️)
— Natalie Escobar (@_NatalieEscobar) February 9, 2021
Walk everywhere and see how the neighborhoods connect. Everything is closer than it seems. Much easier to do in the summer, but it’s the only way to really get a grasp of the city!!
— Scott Nover (@ScottNover) February 9, 2021
Embrace your inner tourist. Go to the Smithsonian, jog around the mall, make plans to tour the Capital/WH/Pentagon. Look for statues and memorials in places you don't expect them uptown.
— Katie (what is dead may never die) Orr ??? (@KatiesOrr) February 9, 2021
1) “The toes you step on today will be connected to the butt you have to kiss tomorrow.” Perennial advice but esp true in DC 2) Walk everywhere as much as you can. On foot you’ll see all the charms and little beauty marks of the city. Also helps with stress lol
— Del. Lesley Lopez (@LesleyJLopez) February 9, 2021
Drive at your own risk.
At the first sign of a snowflake, join the panic and prepare for a snow day. Definitely do not drive, because half the population here never learned to drive in the snow and they’ll ruin your day.
— Alan Roth (@alanrothdc) February 9, 2021
Do not drive to Georgetown on Friday or Saturday night (you would will not find parking). It is definitely great to go to DC’s “playground”don’t be the driver. Actually, this probably doesn’t apply during covid. & be sure to take advantage of all the museums!
— Chrissyghoran (@Chrissyghoran1) February 9, 2021
if you take a wrong turn trying to get out of dc you end up at the pentagon and security judges the heck out of you, not that I would be familiar with such a thing ?
— laynie (@penstone) February 9, 2021
You will rack up at least $2,000.00 in parking tickets. Budget for it now.
— Larry Miller (@LarryMillerTV) February 9, 2021
If you have to drive, note there are three different driving cultures. VA drivers always move immediately to the left-most lane and then drive slow. MD drivers are insane. DC drivers will do anything, at any time, with no warning – except drive faster than 35mph. Even on I-95.
— Joshua Henson (@the1henson) February 9, 2021
WEIRD and SCARY lane / traffic changes on major avenues during rush hour!!!
That lane you are driving southbound on?
Suddenly there are CARS COMING AT YOU GOING NORTHBOUND!!!
Other than that, have fun in DC!!!
— mollyswordmcdonough ? (@mollysmcdonough) February 9, 2021
And finally, never compare DC to that other city:
Never start a sentence, “It’s not New York, but…”
— Kasie Hunt (@kasie) February 9, 2021
Daniella Byck joined Washingtonian in 2022. She was previously with Outside Magazine and lives in NoMa.
