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Your guide to the region's top events, mixed with some commentary about life, media, gossip and politics in Washington, DC.

The Blogger Beat: The Anti DC

This week, we take our best shots at Washington fashion, the Metro, and more with the Anti DC’s Marissa Payne.

By Emily Leaman

Marissa Payne, the Anti DC blogger, at DCU's Van Ness campus. Photograph by Chris Leaman

Freelance writer Marissa Payne started her blog, the Anti DC, in November 2007. She’d blogged before on sites like MySpace, but had never done so with a distinct theme. The idea for a blog to rant about Washington simply came to her one day when her frustrations with the city came to a head. “And voilà!” she says. “The metaphorical crack baby that is the Anti DC was born.”

Payne updates her blog daily and estimates that she spends ten hours a week working on the site. When she’s not actually blogging, she’s thinking about what to blog about next. “I’m a serious dork,” she admits. What does all that work get her? Three hundred visitors a day and an audience she describes as “people who appreciate the art of writing and really clever jokes about bodily functions. So, like, really smart 14-year-old boys.”

We caught up with Payne recently to hear her latest rants about Washington. Overrated neighborhoods? Most pretentious Washington job title? Read on for her answers.

Three reasons to hate DC:
“Let’s see, I really hate how the men here don’t seem to recognize that wearing pleated pants makes them look like they’re also wearing adult diapers. I also don’t really dig the federal government, which is so out of control that it overpowers the subcultures that make DC an actual, legitimate city. I’ll wrap up by noting I’ve never encountered a more rude crew of drivers than I have in DC. Not only have I been nearly rundown on my bike more times than the number of pleats on pants in Congress, but just the other day I saw someone in a Lexus honk at someone else for stopping to let an ambulance with its sirens blaring go by. Heaven forbid we stop to save a life when there’s taxpayer money to waste. Plus, the driver’s ill-fitting suit was probably getting wrinkled. See, all this hating goes hand-in-hand, really.”

Three reasons to love DC:
“This probably won’t make sense to anyone with a modicum of sanity, but one of my favorite things about DC is the fact that it’s so hard to love. For me, it makes for not only excellent blog fodder, but it leads to character building. More tangibly, DC has a pretty tight thrift-shop/vintage scene with stores like Mercedes Bien, which now features the ridiculously awesome Listopad pop-up shop, as well as sprawling thrift stores like Goodwill and Indian Head. I also like that DC seems to have a penchant for mob justice. Perhaps this is just the flip side of the rampant egocentricity that makes DC so vile at times, but I’ve heard about more than one occasion when random citizens have risked their own well-beings to catch criminals, such as when Robert Novak ran over a dude and some cyclist refused to let him drive off, or when a bunch of people chased a gunman down in Adams Morgan on a Sunday morning a few months ago armed only with sticks and the sense of justice. That’s admirable. In New York, people would’ve shrugged and moved on.”

Most overrated and underrated neighborhoods:
“This is a tough one as I think the entire city is a bit overrated, but the most overrated is probably Dupont Circle. I just don’t get it. Whenever I hear people describe it as one of the ‘hippest’ neighborhoods in DC, I always feel slightly vindicated for my snobtastic attitude because save for a few restaurants such as Sushi Taro and Cafe Japoné, I really don’t see what all the fuss is about. The nightclubs there might as well be in Georgetown, which I find absolutely repugnant after dark. Kind of like Adams Morgan and, unfortunately, U Street increasingly on the weekends. It seems after-dark douchiness is creeping east at an alarming rate.

“As far as underrated neighborhoods go, I don’t think people appreciate Mt. Pleasant as much as they probably should. There are some really cool holes-in-the-wall there: Burritos Fast, which, if nothing else, I enjoy for its get-to-the-point name; Marx Café, a wonderful neighborhood bar; and my personal favorite, Don Juan’s, a Mexican joint that serves good food on the cheap. H Street in Northeast is also a bit underrated, although it’s becoming more popular now. It can be a bit of a trip to get out there, but it’s worth it. I’ve never had a bad time out there. Neither has my mom. Although she doesn’t guzzle Sparks with me at the Rock & Roll Hotel, whenever she comes to DC, we make it a point to go to Granville Moore’s for the mussels. Yum.”

Most annoying quality of DC residents:
“In general, I think most people in DC take themselves too seriously, which is why I think people who read my blog either entirely love it or viscerally hate it. I’ve found throughout my sick and twisted years on this Earth that those who are able to laugh at themselves are more enjoyable to be around. Hell, if I wasn’t able to laugh at myself, I’d hate myself, too. I’m an asshole, but a funny asshole. DC has just lots of plain assholes.”

Local leader you most wish you could fire:
“Let me start off by saying I love me some Jim Graham, who’s my councilman. I can’t say I’m so informed about his politics, but I love his bow ties and orange-colored spectacles. As far as firing people goes, I’d only fire someone if I could ensure that I, myself, could take their place. Lately, I’ve been intrigued with DC’s fake senators. I would really like to be one of those. A fancy job title with no responsibilities? Then I’d feel like a true Washingtonian.”

Finish this sentence: “If I had to live in the ’burbs, I’d live in . . .”
“. . . Centreville. Not only is there enough land out there to allow me to build a large compound to keep out other human beings, but it’s also really close to the Bull Run shooting range. Seriously.”

Three things that qualify as “exceptionally messed up sh*t”:
“Exceptionally messed up sh*t comes in all shapes and sizes. It could be anything from some tool in a bar bragging to my friend about all his drunk-driving experiences (true story) to things like Crocs, which I don’t think I need to explain. To round out to an even, er, odd three, I’ll throw in DC cab prices. They’re exceptionally exorbitant.”

Most pretentious Washington job title you’ve ever heard:
“Secretary of Homeland Security. Nothing’s more pretentious than heading a department that probably shouldn’t exist in the first place.”

Least reliable: Metro or bus?
“Luckily I don’t have to deal with either too often because I’m a bike commuter. However, before finding my bike, I regularly rode the bus, and it was horrendous. Honestly, I don’t know why they even bother to post a schedule because it’s obvious the buses operate within a wholly different space/time continuum.”

Why.i.hate.dc: friend or foe?
“I don’t personally know too many other bloggers, so I’ve never met any of the authors of why.i.hate.dc, but I’d like to think if we met we’d be quick friends. I mean, we both hate DC. That’s a strong bond.”

Worst local news broadcast:
“I don’t have a pick for worst, I must say I heart Channel 9’s Derek McGinty. It’s the Mailbag—I love McGinty’s Mailbag. Before I leave DC, whenever that will be, my goal is to get a mention on McGinty’s Mailbag.”

DC’s dress code: better or worse than one year ago?
“Honestly, I think the younger kids coming in are doing much better, but the people my age (late twenties, early thirties) still make me do double takes, in a bad way. Especially now, as people are starting to break out their Uggs (still . . .) to commute to work. There are other shoe options, I swear, that don’t make it look like you have children’s stuffed toys on your feet.”

Where you get your rock ‘n’ roll on:
“When the crowd isn’t horrendous, I really enjoy live shows at the 9:30 Club. It’s the perfect size and the stage is really high off the ground so it’s easy to see the show from anywhere in the club. It also has four bars and, in my rather backward world, booze makes everything better. I also like the Rock & Roll Hotel. It’s a lot smaller and the sound is pretty bad, but the crowds are always much cooler, mostly because their pants are a lot tighter.”

Where you go for some art:

“With all the museums in this city, I should really take advantage of more of them. However, to me, I like to find art in the most unlikely of places. I people-watch a lot, which probably makes me creepy, but I find observing the art of life is at least as enjoyable as the National Portrait Gallery.”

Where you flee to escape DC:
“Speaking of art—Baltimore! I’ve fallen in love with this city in the past couple of months. They have a really awesome music and DJ scene there with acts like Dan Deacon, the Taxlo crew, and Claire Hux. The general population there also juxtaposes with DC’s. I have yet to meet a collar-popping douche bag in Baltimore. If the bike commute was shorter, I’d probably move there.”

Favorite local blog besides your own:
“There are several DC-based blogs that I enjoy, but the one I read most regularly is the DC Universe. It constantly makes me laugh, especially whenever it tackles the Washington Post’s Date Lab feature. I like to imagine Chuck Woolery is the brains behind this blog.”

The Blogger Beat will be off for the next two Wednesdays to celebrate the holidays. We’ll be back on January 7 with Sacha Cohen of Going Green DC for some ecofriendly chatter to kick off the New Year. Check back then for the interview!

Earlier:
Dekan DC
Scofflaw’s Den
All Blogger Beat interviews

Have a favorite local blogger you’d like to hear from? Send an e-mail to eleaman@washingtonian.com.

More>> Capital Comment Blog | News & Politics | Society Photos


Category Tags: Blogger Beat


Comments


7 At the end of the air filled with the desire to shop, windows everywhere Sale, the people involved in purchasing again and again the tide. As long as you look accurate, it is cheaper to buy a variety of favorite long can the good goods. can be concentrated in such raids without reckoning wanton procurement, but also easy to lose, so their reduced to "junk woman".
shopping, celebrities have always charge the former, experience is particularly rich . The stars of the shopping in Hong Kong after discount on large numbers of summer vacation in Hong Kong were more strongly into China. But the star, after all, not a fashion designer, was at a higher level, the reason gold, this issue also invite more place the most active designers and fashion people, personally surgeon, to help you sort out the change of the fashion pulse of new and old, peeling silkworm spinning, out of season rush to buy discount focus and dedication from their losses and gains experience.
Cecilia
raids Location: Times Square, Causeway Bay shopping
focus: the rebate, is cost-effective to buy cosmetics. In addition, Times Square, selling all kinds of girls clothing all year round, it is suitable for Cecilia’s style.
link Beijing: China Friendship Department Store < br> bag bargains key: even if a discount, the top big things, or very expensive. Therefore, learning to Cecilia, a down to meet their own tastes, purchasing power of local girls shopping for their installed it.
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raids Location: Pacific Place shopping
focus: Jessica, said: "buying things, the mood is most important, a discount is still followed. discount when the mind to keep the wrong reason will not buy a shirt. "seasonal, the Pacific Place and other brands such as D & G will hit 5 discount, shoppers are crazy. Jessica shopping frenzy does not belong to the girl, she likes to enjoy a leisurely way to try on clothes in the environment.
Link Beijing: Palace Hotel
bag bargains focus: a world-class brand of seasonal goods, but also enjoy five-star shopping environment. discount store dressing room to be some period of long lines, very annoying.
Carina Lau
mop Location: Central, The Landmark
shopping points: famous discount, the Carina is often the first time in the Landmark in Central to buy some clothes. waiting there almost every day, paparazzi photographed celebrities visiting the shop shapes and sizes. If there were paparazzi be exposed Shu Qi in the Landmark bought the former boyfriend Dawn LV purse.
link Beijing: International Trade
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raids Location: City Plaza shopping
points: Shirley admitted that discount when buying more for the family, prefer the design of flu in some famous small jewelry, see the chic, will be more to buy some souvenirs. Shirley that time to the mid-range priced discount shopping, more affordable, cost-effective.
link Beijing: Oriental Plaza
bag bargains focus :louis vuitton handbags There are many new jewelry store in particular is worth watching.nike shoes
Tsang
raids Location: Causeway Bay shopping Crawford
key: Do not look to see Eric Tsang, in fact, but his authentic "human fashion . "discount in August each year seven seasons, Crawford boutique often as low as 6 fold, Eric Tsang usually discounted selection of men’s time,replica IWC, including attending events to wear suits, usually wear casual clothes when shopping and so on.
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Anthony Wong
raids Location: Causeway Bay SOGO SOGO shopping
focus: shopping is clearly not just a small girl’s patent, even if it rough as Anthony Wong’s "character man" is also keen to Shopping, I once SOGO SOGO Department Store in Causeway Bay and saw Anthony Wong, accompanied by the Assistant buy clothes. He admitted that from time to time the discount SOGO activities is to attract one of the reasons he went. Anthony Wong preference with punk-style clothing, hand-painted T-shirts and with nail jeans will let Anthony Wong put it down.
link Beijing: SOGO, Parkson
bag bargains key: do not discount timing activities,mbt shoes give you a lot of value for money windfall.
Ekin Cheng
mop Location: Sai Yee Street, (Shoes Street)
shopping focus: not so in love with actress and cosmetics to buy pretty dresses everywhere, like the movement of Ekin Cheng usually buy more emphasis on sports and leisure shoes, so Sneaker Street in Mong Kok he must be free to visit the place. Shoes Street stores selling NIKE, ADIDAS and so on of the newest sports and leisure shoes are usually sold at prices of seven Bazhe it off for the birth does not know how frugal is Ekin Cheng It is a very economical choice, so he does not shoot as long as it will go to buy a few pairs of sneakers Street favorite shoes home.
link Beijing: SOGO Oriental Plaza Sports 100
bag bargains Focus: Sports class clothing. Movement like you, discount,mbt shoes be sure to buy some more.
She Poetry Man
raids Location: Harbour City, Tsim Sha Tsui shopping
points: Poetry Man She always busy filming, not so ordinary girl visit this store a lot of time, so she likes to Harbour City, you can also see the works of famous fashion designers and international famous brand stores, discount focus when, against a lot of things to be able to Amoy.
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Posted by: sneakercn, Jun 29, 2011 04:37:14 AM

I live in Baltimore, and there are parts that I love and parts that I hate. You have NOT experienced the entire city if you have not seen a popped-collar anywhere. And actually most of the city is like that...go to Federal Hill, Mt. Vernon, Canton, Fells Point, Roland Park, should I continue??? There are parts of the interview I agree with, but all I see here is a Hipster that hates anything "mainstream." Not everything that’s mainstream sucks and not everything that’s indie is amazing...

Posted by: Baltimore, Dec 18, 2008 05:55:16 AM

I agree for the most part with the interview. The only thing that is tough to deal with is the pleat issue. As a man, I never wear pleats on anything other than a suit. With that said, it is incredibly difficult to find a variety of suits that are flat-front AND good quality wool. A lot of people say "get hugo boss," but that is a terrible quality wool.

So, as it stands, I wear a single or double pleat on suit trousers, which are usually covered with the jacket anyhow.

Posted by: DC Guy, Dec 17, 2008 06:45:19 PM

The greatest irony here is that she is *SO* DC. The snarkiness? The ability to place the existence of world wide trends (crocs etc.) in DC? The ability to claim H Street ’is finally becoming popular’? When I lived on H Street not 10 years ago, none of the places mentioned were even there!

Posted by: Oh, my., Dec 17, 2008 01:02:59 PM

Congrats, Marissa, well-deserved.

Posted by: Arjewtino, Dec 17, 2008 01:01:12 PM

Just a note about my tights...

It’s actually an old "trend," which finds its roots on last year’s runways. So as far as the private school kids, who I all thought wore uniforms anyway (then again, what do I know?), I congratulate them on finally coming around. Like I said, the younger kids are really getting more fashion conscious in this city, which I think is great.

Anyway, thanks everyone for your feedback (both good and bad, of course)!

Posted by: Marissa, Dec 17, 2008 12:06:10 PM

Ugh, I’ve totally been in that ambulance honking situation.

Nice interview, Marissa!

Posted by: Missy, Dec 17, 2008 12:01:40 PM

It sounds like you barely know the city. You don’t necessarily look young, but you definitely sound it. I went through the same thing in college when I lived in Europe:everyone was rude, the food could be hit or miss, and winters in London - depression is an understatement. It’s ok to like someplace other than your hometown, or even try to get used to it. I see you’ve taken up the local trend of bright tights that all the private school girls love so much.

Posted by: Franny, Dec 17, 2008 11:56:05 AM

So let me get this straight: you prefer Baltimore, drug and sexually transmitted disease capital, over the Nation’s Capital? What are you, a New Yorker?

Posted by: Janice , Dec 17, 2008 11:45:42 AM

Crocs *and* Uggs both get a mention for their craptasticness. I’m giving you a standing ovation in my living room. right. now.

As for DateLab, can I just tell you that I actually went on a date as part of that but the dude was so freaky afterward that it was never published? Remind me to tell you the whole story sometime... You can call it "The Anti-DateLab." -the DCGF

Posted by: the DC Goodwill Fashionista, Dec 17, 2008 11:17:39 AM

Congratulations, Marissa! It’s great to see you recognized.

Posted by: Shannon, Dec 17, 2008 11:02:16 AM

I don’t mind Dupont Circle itself, especially during the warmer months. I love the fountain, the dogs, the chess players and how it’s a bit of pretty in the middle of office buildings and embassies. I disagree with the blogger; after living in Davis (incidentally- it may be the most bike-friendly city in the country), San Francisco, Dallas and Manhattan, I think D.C. is one of the more UNDERRATED cities in America, but to each our own.

It’s always easier (and often, more fun!) to be negative than positive, about anything, but especially with regards to what you blog. Still, I’ll check her site out. Thank you for this feature. I’ll let you know when I start my Pro-DC blog, just to bring a little balance to the universe. ;)

Posted by: Anna, Dec 17, 2008 10:41:14 AM

Why don’t you move? This says you’re a freelance writer. Doesn’t that mean you can be based anywhere? You can’t really complain if you don’t do anything about your situation.

Posted by: really?, Dec 17, 2008 10:25:59 AM

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