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Metalachi Mixes Metal and Mariachi

They also think the word ''chichis'' is hilarious, apparently.
Metalachi's members wear costumes and don't disclose their real names. Photo courtesy Metalachi.

As far as fusion tribute acts go, Metalachi is certainly unique. As their name implies, the band takes heavy metal classics and performs them in a mariachi-style. It’s a bizarre concept that has interesting results: Randy Rhoads probably never intended his guitar solos to be performed on a violin, but that’s one of the best moments on the group’s cover of Ozzy Osborne’s “Crazy Train.”

Despite an unusual shtick, the group doesn’t take itself seriously, and almost everything written about and by Metalachi is a joke. As a result, finding out more about the band isn’t an easy feat. It doesn’t help that its members don costumes and don’t disclose their real names.

The group’s bio implies that they were consummated from a sports-team gang bang, describing their mother as such: “What began as an innocent night of snorting horse tranquilizers in a hotel room with seven members of the village jai alai team went on to produce the greatest metal band to ever live. Unhampered by a steady regime of tequila and ill advised sumo lessons, nine months later five bastard children where born.”

Nowhere is it clear whether the members of Metalachi are actually brothers or not.

Questioning the band directly provides even less clarity. Metalachi seems to have missed the memo that sexism in music isn’t cool, and trumpet player El Cucuy dedicated most of his answers to talking about women’s breasts. “After being influenced by the kick ass Black Sabbath album Paranoid,” he writes in an email, “we tried performing one of their songs at a quinceañera and that was the first time our music resulted in us being flashed by chichis.”

Asked what songs he most enjoys playing with Metalachi, El Cucuy cites Pantera’s “Cemetery Gates” and adds, “Any song that results in chichis being shoved into my face which is different depending on the city we are in.”

His responses don’t get any better when asked whether Metalachi fully supports the band: “This is our full time job, but sometimes we still do traditional mariachi gigs when we get the chance. My face also works as a part-time mammogram and I am taking online college courses to become a Chichis Whisperer.”

Live videos are just as offensive, and with constant comments about “chichis” on stage, Metalachi makes one thing very clear: The group doesn’t care about alienating female fans with its sexist comments. That careless chauvinism is unfortunate for a group that could’ve carved out an interesting niche for itself with its unique concept.

Metalachi performs with Omnislash on Friday, October 9 at the Black Cat. Tickets cost $15.

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