News & Politics

Food Money Sex: Covered in Peanut Butter and Wheat Thins

The weekend consumption diary for a random Washingtonian.

In Food Money Sex, we ask anonymous Washingtonians to diary the food they ate, the money they spent, and the sex they had over the course of their weekends. On Mondays, we put it on the internet. This week:

  • Does: Account executive at a marketing firm, 24
  • Lives: Define “live.” I pay rent for a Eckington house with 3 roommates. I almost always “stay” at my boyfriend’s apartment in Mt. Vernon.
  • Is: Female
  • Makes: $48,000
  • Married? No. I’m in a relatively new but bizarrely serious relationship.
  • Friday: Coffee, coffee, coffee. Cava for dinner.
  • Saturday: Half a vegan gluten-free coconut chocolate bar from TCB and a coffee, a few bites of bites of my boyfriend’s Chop’t quinoa bowl and a handful of trail mix for lunch. Went to a black-tie gala where dinner is served with lots of drink. Cocktails at Jack Rose after.
  • Sunday: Holy hangover. Philz at 11 AM on a Sunday = line out the door. Instead, I sit at the Starbucks across from the zoo and sip on an iced coffee. Hank’s in Dupont for lunch. Oysters, ceviche, salmon reuben and crabcake grits benedict. We order pizza and wings from We, the Pizza for a late dinner accompanied by another thrilling episode of Westworld. We split a Georgetown Cupcake from the gala swag bags.
  • Friday: Cava ($8), however I do total my expenses for the month of October and OUCH. If you ever go to Iceland, budget more than you expect.
  • Saturday: Surprisingly, I only end up spending $7 at TCB for the coffee and breakfast bar, and $24 at Jack Rose for a whiskey and vodka tonic at the end of the night. Almost lost $100 in a silent auction at the gala, but I was persuaded out of not bidding.
  • Sunday: Starbucks iced coffee ($3.50) and split the bill at Hank’s ($36).
  • Total: $78.50
  • Friday: “On my own, pretending he’s beside me”…Name that musical.
  • Saturday:  The sex with boyfriend is incredible. Like really, really good. He lives in a studio, so it’s fun to romp around the whole space, so we have a little “mid-afternoon romp” on the couch/bathroom sink, followed by a nap. And then once more, post nap, before we start getting ready for the event. We get home around 12:30 AM very drunk. It’s comical, but most of the times we come home after drinking, he gets so consumed with eating that he simply forgets I exist—like the one time, mid-sex, he gets up off me and goes to the kitchen abruptly, I pass out angry, and wake to find him on the couch covered in peanut butter and Wheat Thins. Lucky me, tonight we have drunk sex (to completion) and pass out around 1 AM.
  • Sunday: Hungover morning sex at 7 AM. Still good. After a magnificent lunch bloat from Hank’s, we do it on the couch again in between episodes of Chopped. Perfect Sunday.

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