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Food Money Sex: Drag Brunch, Ethiopian Food, and $16 Cocktails With the Bestie

The weekend consumption diary for a random Washingtonian.

In Food Money Sex, we ask anonymous Washingtonians to diary the food they ate, the money they spent, and the sex they had over the course of their weekends. On Mondays, we put it on the internet. This week:
  • Does: Communications Manager, 33
  • Lives: Meridian Hill, in a studio by myself. I use this fact to convince myself I’m making it as a real adult.
  • Is: Female
  • Makes: $75K
  • Married? Chronically Single
  • Friday: It was my birthday this weekend and my best friend came all the way from our home flyover state in Middle America to celebrate with drag brunch and day drinking. On Friday, we tried Compass Rose first knowing it’d be a crapshoot, and alas it was with a 2 hour wait at 8 PM. No thanks. Instead, we got Ethiopian in Adams Morgan. We split a veggie sampler platter and each had two glasses of wine while waiting for the lone, obviously overworked and harried waiter to bring us the bill. We’ve both been that guy and thus tipped well.
  • Saturday: Drag brunch at Nellie’s is a must for a special occasion, but every time I go to a drag show (once every 5 years or so) I’m an idiot and forget about the tipping thing. I also didn’t know about the dance at the end for those celebrating special occasions. I chugged my free birthday-mosa and quickly abdicated the spotlight to the other gals. I pretty much ate a little bit of everything from the buffet, which was rather good. One free mimosa with brunch. One “Fuck Trump” cocktail for funsies. One chugged (and free!) mimosa at the end there. My friends and I then went to Green Hat Distillery because I love gin and they love to humor me. One cocktail with a funny Comey-pun that I can’t remember. Followed by an Old Fashioned at Republic Restoratives just around the corner. By this point we’re all pretty schnockered. We decide food is of the essence and there’s no better place than Thip Khao. Which, we learned after a 15-minute Lyft ride, wasn’t open yet. While we waited, I took a call from Dad who wished me a very happy birthday. By that point, the restaurant was open so we sat down and asked the waiter what we should eat. We ended up with a full fish served upright on a platter along with various veggies and rice. Also Tam Muk Muang, and Khao Poon with shrimp. We ordered for three, but ended up with a table of two after the liquor got the best of the BFF.
  • Sunday: I took my friend to Paradise Winery for some hair of the dog. We stopped at Teeter for picnic food first and then spend the day lounging outside in the sun with wine. On the drive back we saw a bunch of people in line for an ice cream shop in Clifton. We stopped and also stood in line (so vogue right now). It was pretty good.
  • Friday: Ethiopian Food & Wine: $26
  • Saturday: Nellie’s Brunch: $40 (pre-paid in March). Green Hat Distillery: $76.99 for my birthday present, a trio of gins. Republic Restoratives: $16.20 for one freaking expensive cocktail. Lyft ride to Thip Khao: $11.98. Thip Khao: $40.55.
  • Sunday: Paradise Winery tasting & wine: $62.54. Picnic from Harris Teeter: $21.36. Ice Cream at some famous place in Clifton, VA: $7.75.
  • Total: $303.37
  • Sorry to disappoint both y’all and my best friend’s husband, but there was no sex.

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