Everyone loves ice cream, right? It’s a topic we can all get behind, like sunshine or the fact that Donald Trump’s hair resembles corn silk. Well, not anymore. Uber is using ice cream to divide Washington this Friday by politicizing our favorite summertime treat in their latest delivery promotion.
While people in other cities like Cleveland are picking between strawberry and vanilla, Washingtonians who want Nestlé Drumstick cones delivered to their doors must decide between red, white, or blue wrappers to show what Uber calls their “partisan pride.” In case you’re wondering, white pride in this case signals independents—not traditionally marked by the color—instead of white supremacists or Taliban supporters. Whichever hue is ordered most frequently between 11 and 5 will be deemed the “true party in power” by Uber. Who needs elections?
Should you decide to cast your vote in a swirl of vanilla, nuts, and fudge—at a $15 minimum—here are the details on how to order/ruin the joy of ice cream by making it into a meaningless political battle.