MOB Monday: Bachelor Party Confusion

Our resident wedding etiquette expert, Leslie Milk, Washingtonian lifestyle editor and author of It’s Her Wedding But I’ll Cry If I Want To: A Survival Guide for the Mother of the Bride, answers questions from and about MOBs (or MOGs!)

I’m a father-of-the-bride, and my future son-in-law invited me to his bachelor party—dinner and “clubbing.” I’m flattered, but I would feel very uncomfortable attending. Is there a way to bow out politely?

You should indeed by flattered that your future son-in-law wants to include you in his boys’ night out. But assuming that boys will be boys and the after-dinner clubbing won’t involved books and backgammon, you are wise to skip the festivities. Plead pre-wedding responsibilities. Blame it on the mother of the bride. Suggest you’d like to get together for a lunch or a local sports event once things quiet down, so he’ll know that you do want to build a relationship.


My daughter has five bridesmaids, none of whom have volunteered to plan her a bridal shower. Is it okay for me to throw one for her?

Bridesmaids aren’t the only ones who can host bridal showers. Young women involved in school or budding careers, often living out of town, may not be able to take on responsibility or the expense of throwing a shower. But it is awkward for the mother of the bride to step in. Why not see if an aunt or friend of the family would like to do the honors.

Do you have a wedding etiquette question for Leslie? E-mail and we’ll get you the answer!