MoB Monday: Do We Have To Invite…?

Our resident wedding etiquette expert, Leslie Milk—Washingtonian lifestyle editor and author of It’s Her Wedding, But I’ll Cry If I Want To: A Survival Guide for the Mother of the Bride—answers your questions.

“Um…who are you again?”

My dad is insisting on inviting many of his business associates to my wedding—including many people I don’t even know. He is paying for the wedding, so do I have to let him invite them?
Can you diplomatically remind your dad that this is your wedding, not a payback for past social obligations? One bride I know imposed a good rule for her powerful father: “Please don’t invite anyone I wouldn’t recognize or who wouldn’t recognize me by sight.” If he insists, you may be stuck with the company of strangers. But as long as you do have your nearest and dearest around, don’t let it ruin your day.

My future mother-in-law bought a dress that’s totally inappropriate for our wedding—it’s a sparkly beaded gown, and we’re having a Sunday afternoon wedding at a vineyard (which she knew before buying the dress!). Should I say something to her, or just let her wear the gown?
The “red-hot mama” strikes again! If she knew in advance and decided to overdress anyway, nothing you can say will convince her this isn’t her opportunity to shine—literally. Just let it go. You’ll outshine her anyway, and will seem all that more gracious in the eyes of the groom.
Do you have wedding etiquette question for Leslie? E-mail and we’ll get you the answer.