I really dislike my daughter’s fiancé. Don’t I have an obligation to tell her?
Let’s define “dislike.” Are we talking, “He had his hand on my thigh during dinner and his hand on the family silver afterward?” or “I saw his face on America’s Most Wanted?” If so, you might share this information with the preface, “I’m sure there’s a reasonable explanation . . .” But what is far more likely is that the groom-to-be doesn’t fit the picture you painted in your head of your daughter’s perfect mate. He’s not the boy next door—or even the boy from the country next door. His financial future isn’t as secure as you’d like—whose is, these days? Whatever the reasons for your misgivings, recognize them for what they are—yours. You don’t have an obligation to tell your daughter, you have an obligation to get past them or, at the very least, keep them to yourself.
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